Maple Walnut Energy Bars

What NOT to do when you have a bat trapped in your apartment:

Don't attempt to capture the bat by throwing a blanket over it while it's flying around your head. You will never catch that sonnabitch. It also may pee or poop on you. No fun. I don't even know what bat poop looks like and I never want to find out.

Don't let your dogs in the same room as the bat. The dogs will think it's a chew toy and will chase after the bat like it's life depended on it. For HOURS.

Don't try to remove the bat from the corner of a window with a pair of kitchen tongs. You will get bit and have to go to the ER for a rabies shot.  You may also turn into a vampire.

Don't stare into it's beady eyes. The bat will secure total mind control over you.

What TO DO when you have a bat in your house:

Put as many layers of clothing on as possible, including gloves and a winter hat, despite the fact that it's 92 degrees in your apartment. Carefully open the window, run out of the room and shut the door behind you.

While you wait for the killer vampire bat to quietly leave get the hell outta your bedroom, make some maple walnut energy bars. They take about 10 minutes to throw together, just enough time for the bat to realize that it's out of it's element and that it needs to reck-onize and fly back into the night.

You give the bat an extra 20 minutes, you know... just because, which is exactly how long it takes for these energy bars to firm up in the freezer.

You slowly open the door, in case the bat, in your absence, gave birth to 72 baby bats, and they are waiting on the other side of the door to kill you.

You peek around, realize the bat is gone and slam the window shut.

With all that energy expended you go enjoy yourself a shot of whiskey and an energy bar.

You deserve it.

Maple Walnut Energy Bars (makes 12 bars)
Slightly adapted from Muffin Tin Mania

1 1/2 c. rolled oats
1 c. chopped pitted dates
1/2 c. raisins
1/2 c. raw cashews
1/2 c. walnuts
1/3 c. sunflower seeds
2 T. ground flax seed
2 T. hemp seed
2 T. sesame seeds
couple pinches of sea salt
1/3 c. maple syrup
1/4 c. peanut butter (or any other nut butter)
1/4 c. raw cacao nibs (optional)

Lightly grease a 12 cup muffin tin with a little coconut oil (or any other neutral tasting oil).  This method will give you pretty decent sized energy "cups". However, you can skip this step and form the mixture into small bars or balls and then proceed with the recipe.
Place all ingredients except the peanut butter and maple syrup in a food processor and process until oats and nuts resemble fine crumbs. Add the peanut butter and maple syrup and blend until the mixture clumps together. Divide the mixture between the greased muffin cups and press down to firmly pack contents.
Place tray in the freezer for 20-30 minutes to harden up, then unmold and store in an airtight container in the fridge. If you made bars or balls, simply freeze on a cookie sheet and then transfer to an airtight container or wrap individually in saran wrap and store in the refrigerator.

Blueberry Apricot Crisp

Blueberry season is in full swing! Just last week I made it out to a pick your own farm and walked away with nine pints of berries for a mere twelve bucks. I love blueberries in my morning yogurt or just noshing on them straight up, but the best part of fresh picked berries is making crisp.  I've made crisp with apples, strawberries, blackberries, and peaches, but blueberry crisp is where it's at!  I decided to switch things up a bit by throwing in some apricots (mostly because I had some in my fridge that needed to be used ASAP), and now I can officially say that blueberries and apricots are BFF's.

I have a go-to vegan crisp topping that I have used for years with much success, but wanted to switch it up and try it with butter instead of oil, because really, sometimes a little butter makes everything a little better.

The recipe for the topping is loosely adapted from a crisp recipe from this recipe from Nourish Your Roots.  It's bonkers good.  So good that my sister and my two little nieces ate the whole pan for breakfast within a half hour of coming out of the oven.  Yeah, we all burned our tongues on scalding hot blueberries, but it was oh so worth it.

...Homegirls are WEARING those blueberries!

Blueberry Apricot Crisp


1 pint blueberries
8 small apricots, pitted and chopped
2 T. white spelt flour
3 T. organic brown sugar


Crumble:
1/2 c. white spelt flour
1/2 c. organic brown sugar
1/2 c. rolled oats
1/4 t. salt
6 T. cold unsalted butter, cut into small pieces


Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Place blueberries and apricots in a 9 by 9 inch glass baking dish. Sprinkle with the flour and brown sugar.
To make the crumble, combine the white spelt flour, brown sugar, oats, salt and butter in a small bowl. Work the mixture with your hands for a couple minutes until crumbly.
Sprinkle the crumble evenly over the apricots and blueberries.
Bake 40-45 minutes until the blueberries are nice and bubbly.

Serve straight up or with a heaping scoop of vanilla ice cream.

Oatcakes

These aren't your typical oatcakes.

Why do I know this?

'Cause I like to look up random facts on wikipedia, so when someone asks me a question on some far fetched subject I will inevitably know the answer.

One day I will be a finalist on jeapordy. Just you wait..

So apparently the Scottish, English, and Canadians all have there own version of a propa' oatcake. 

Some oatcakes are more cracker like or chewy, whereas others are more resemblant of a pancake.

This one here is neither cracker like or chewy and sure as hell doesn't look or taste like a pancake.

Although they look like mini muffins, they are more like a dense biscuit or a cookie.. A cookie biscuit!

My friend/co-worker Renee featured these on her awesome blog, Nourish Your Roots via a recipe from Supernatural Everyday's mastermind Heidi Swanson from 101 Cookbooks.  Both of these ladies got it going on, so I figured if THEY liked them, I would as well.

Packed with oats, whole wheat pastry flour, flax seed, maple syrup, coconut oil and a little organic sugar, and some eggs these are perfect for a quick snack or breakfast on the go.. and because they are so dense, they keep you full for hours.

Oatcakes (makes 12)
Slightly adapted from Nourish Your Roots via Supernatural Everyday by Heidi Swanson
3 c. rolled oats
2 c. whole wheat pastry flour
1/2 t. baking powder
2 t. sea salt
1/4 c. flax seed
2/3 c. coconut oil
3/4 c. maple syrup
1/2 c. cane sugar
2 eggs, lightly beaten
　
Preheat oven to 325 with a rack in the top third of oven. Grease a standard 12 c. muffin pan with coconut oil Combine oats, flour, baking powder, salt, and flax seeds in a large mixing bowl.
In a medium saucepan over low heat combine the coconut oil, maple syrup, and sugar and slowly melt together. stir just until the coconut oil melts and sugar has dissolved, but don't let mixture get too hot. You don't want to cook the eggs on contact in the next step.
Pour coconut oil mixture over the oat mixture. Stir a bit with a fork, add the eggs and stir again until everything comes together into a wet dough. Spoon dough into muffin cups, nearly filling them.
Bake for 25-30 minutes until the edges of each oatcake are deeply golden. Remove pan from he oven and let cool for a couple of minutes. Then, run a knife around the edges of the cakes and tip them out onto a cooling rack. serve warm or at room temp.

Savory Oatmeal Cookies

Cookies. I'm not talking chocolate chip or oatmeal raisin here.

I'm talking cookies chocked full of rolled oats, fresh grated pecorino romano, rosemary and olive oil, topped with sprinkling of flaky, melt on your tongue, maldon salt.

THAT is what I'm talking about.

Enjoy 'em with some tea for a savory breakfast. 

Serve 'em at your next cocktail party with some cheese, nuts and olives.

OR..

Just eat 'em straight up!

Savory Oatmeal Cookies (makes 18 cookies)
From The Kitchn

1 cup rolled oats
1/4 cup warm water
1/3 cup extra virgin olive oil
1/4 cup lightly packed light brown sugar
1 large egg, beaten
1 cup sifted unbleached all purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon fine sea salt
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
2 teaspoons chopped rosemary
1/4 teaspoon freshly cracked black pepper
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
Flakey sea salt such as Maldon or fleur de sel

Preheat the oven to 350° F.
Place the oats in a large mixing bowl and sprinkle the water over them.
In a small bowl, mix the olive oil, brown sugar and egg. Pour this mixture over the oats, stir to combine, and set aside.
In another mixing bowl, combine the flour, fine sea salt, baking soda, rosemary, and black pepper. Whisk to combine well. Stir in the Parmesan.
Gradually sprinkle the flour mixture over the oat mixture, stirring until combined.
Form 1 tablespoon size scoops of batter and place, evenly spaced on a parchment paper or baking mat-lined cookie sheet. Flatten each piece of dough to about 1/4-inch thick. Use your hands to form an even disk. Sprinkle a pinch of salt on top of each.
Bake for 15-17 minutes, until the edges are slightly darkened.
Remove to a cooling rack.

Oatmeal Chia Chocolate Balls

It's 8:27 p.m.
You are craving chocolate (more specifically, chocolate chip cookies) like nobodys business.

Option number 1:  Throw on several layers of clothes (hey, it's cold out there) and haul ass to the grocery store, only to lose your parking spot, having to park four blocks away upon your return.

Option number 2: Beg your significant other or housemate to go the store for you. Bribe them.

Option number 3: Peel your butt of the couch and make these oatmeal chia chocolate balls! They take around 10 minutes from start to finish and are loads healthier than eating the real deal.

I'm not going to lie and say these taste like chocolate chip cookies, 'cause they don't. If you are expecting a sugar/white flour/butter bomb (which I do love on occasion) then these aren't for you.

But... if you are looking for something quick to satisfy that sweet tooth, that is actually healthy for you, and isn't a piece of fruit, then these are the treats for you!


Let's talk superfoods.

We've got dates, oats, raw cacao, chia seeds and some lucuma powder.

Dates are a great source of fiber and contain high amounts of potassium, magnesium, and B vitamins. They are also a great natural source of energy as they have natural food based sugar like glucose, sucrose and fructose, making them perfect when you need a quick boost without the crash.

Oats help to lower cholesterol, boost immuinity and help stabilize blood sugar. They contains loads of soluble fiber and contain high amounts of vitamin E, zinc, selenium, iron and magnesium and have a good amount of protein. Now you know why you start your day with a bowl of oatmeal!

Raw cacao (unprocessed chocolate) contains high amounts of anti-oxidants and is one of the best sources of magnesium (which happens to be the most deficient mineral in the diet of modern cultures. Magnesium helps to relax muscles, improve digestion and is benefical to the heart and cardiovascular system. Chocolate gets a bad reputation for causing weight gain, cavities and diabetes, which only occurs when you add dairy, sugar and other fillers.  Chocolate in it's unprocessed form, however can help you LOSE weight (because of it's high chromium content) prevent cavities (theobromine actually kills one of the strains of bacteria that causes tooth decay) and can regulate blood sugar (again, due to the chromium content) which is beneficial for diabetes.

Chia seeds (ch-ch-ch chia) are the best source of omega 3 fatty acids with high amounts of calcium, protein, fiber, antioxidants and other vitamins and minerals. They help improve stamina, digestion and help reduce cravings because of their high levels of soluble fiber.

Lucuma powder is made from the subtropical fruit of the pouteria lucuma tree native to Peru and Equador. It has a sweet, almost butterscoth like flavor and is high in calcium, magnesium and potassium and iron. It has anti-inflammatory properties and helps boost immunity.



Oatmeal Chia Chocolate Bites (makes 8 balls, or 16 little bites)
Adapted from Tasty-yummies


6 Medjool dates, pitted and chopped
1 1/4 c. oats
1/3 c. raw cacao nibs
1 T. chia seeds
1/2 t. lucuma powder (optional)
2 T. honey
1/4 t. vanilla extract
1-2 T. water (if needed)


Place the pitted chopped dates in the food processor with 1 T. water and the vanilla extract and process to create a uniform paste, scraping down the sides, as needed. If the mixture seems a little dry, add a bit more water.
Add 1 c. of the oats, chia seeds, honey, and lucuma (if using) and process until combined. Add the raw cacao nibs and the remaining 1/4 c. oats and pulse to combine. If the dough seems too dry, add a bit more water. If it's too goopy add a bit more oats.


Roll mixture into balls with the palms of your hands (I used 1 T. for the small bites and 2 T. for the larger ones). Allow them to chill for 20 minutes in the frige before digging in.
Store in an airtight container for up five days in the refigerator.

Easy.

Now go and satisfy that craving with zero effort and zero guilt.

Goji Berry Granola

Who doesn't love granola?

The store bought stuff is great in a pinch, but making your own is where it's at.

It's cheaper and healthier, no doubt. Plus, when you make your own, you have total control over the ingredients. Don't like almonds? No bigs, add some pistachios instead. Tired of raisins? How about some mulberries or dried apricots. Throw in some hemp or flax seeds to up your intake of omega 3 fatty acids.  Get crazy with it.

Oats, honey, goji berries and coconut oil.  All the stuff that was never in your breakfast cereal as a kid, but should have been.

Get your granola on and start the morning off right! 
Goji Berry Granola (Makes 5 cups)

3 1/2 c. rolled oats
3/4 c. shredded coconut
2 t. cinnamon
1/4 t. nutmeg
3/4 t. ground ginger
scant 1/4 t. sea salt
6 T. coconut oil, melted
2/3 c. honey
1 c. goji berries

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease a large baking sheet with coconut oil.
Place the oats, shredded coconut, cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger and salt in a large bowl.
Add coconut oil and honey and mix until oats are well coated.
Spread the oat mixture on the prepared baking sheet. Bake 12 minutes and stir granola well. Return to the oven and bake an additional 12 minutes. Stir again and return to the oven for five minutes or until golden brown. (Keep a close eye. The oats can go from toasty to burned in no time!)
Remove from the oven and stir in goji berries. Allow to cool, then transfer to an airtight container.

Apple Crisp

Apples, apples, apples...

These days I'm borderline obsessed with the fruit. Apple cider, apple pancakes, hard cider, cider donuts, apple muffins, apple butter.. and now..

Apple Crisp!

I'm usually not a dessert person, but a recent trip to a local apple orchard left me with more apples than I knew what to do with.  I picked up some braeburns, which seemed like a good apple: hard, tart, and crisp, perfect for snacking or baking. 

They weren't all that.

Crunchy, yes. Flavorful, no.

So, I added some sugar, spice and everything nice, popped it in the oven and transfomed my ho-hum apples into a delicious sweet treat.

I'm one of those people that will justify eating apple crisp for breakfast. I mean it's got oats and apples and it's vegan.. It's pretty much like eating a bowl of heart healthy oatmeal.

Or so I tell myself.

Apple Crisp (serves 4-6) Slightly adapted from this recipe

4 lbs. apples, peeled and sliced
1/2 c. brown sugar
1/2 c. organic sugar
1/2 c. apple cider
1 T. arrowroot
1 t. cinnamon
1/2 t. nutmeg
1/4 t. allspice
1/8 t. cloves

Topping:

1 c. oats
1/2 c. oat flour
1/2 c. spelt flour
1/4 c. brown sugar
1/4 c. organic sugar
1/2 t. baking powder
1/2 t. cinnamon
1/3 c. sunflower oil
3 T. rice milk
1/2 t. vanilla extract

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place sliced apples in a 9" by 9" pan. Mix together the sugars, cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice and cloves, pour over the apples and mix well. In a small bowl, dissolve the arrowroot in the apple cider, then pour over the apples.
Now for the topping: Mix together the sugars, flours, baking soda, and cinnamon. In a separate bowl combine the sunflower oil, rice milk, and vanilla. Stir the oil mixture to the flour/sugar mixture.  Crumble the topping evenly over the apples. Bake for 45 minutes, or until lightly browned on top. Let cool fifteen minutes before serving.

P.S. share the apple peels with your dogs... they will love you hardcore.

Savory Oat and Nut Vegetable Burgers

This veggie burger is no joke.
If it got into a fighting match with a boca burger it would do some serious damage.

I'm not a big fan of storebought frozen vegetable burgers. 
Why?
1.They are super expensive.
2.They have way too many ingredients.
3.They taste like cardboard.

These burgers are cheap to make, contain whole food ingredients (oats, almonds, walnuts, vegetables etc.) and come together in two shakes of a lambs tail (aka mad quick)

oats, walnuts, almonds, sesame seeds, nutritional yeast and other savory spices..

grated carrots, onion, parsley and cooked oats...

All together now!

Savory Oat and Nut Vegetable Burgers (makes 2 large burgers)

1/2 c. oats
1/4 c. cooked oats
1 medium carrot, peeled and grated
2 T. parsley, chopped
2 T. onion, diced
1 T. nutritional yeast
1 T. sesame seeds
1 T. tamari
1/4 c. almonds, ground
3 T. walnuts, ground
1/4 t. rubbed sage
1/4 t. mustard powder
1/4 t. celery seed
1/4 t. black pepper
1/4 t. sea salt
oil for frying

First, cook up some oats.  Place 2/3 c. water, a pinch of salt and 1/4 c. oats in a small saucepan.  Cook on medium low heat until oats are cooked. Set aside to cool.
Place 1/2 c. oats, the ground nuts, sesame seeds, nutritional yeast and spices in a medium sized bowl.  Add the onion, carrot, parsley and tamari.  When the oats have cooled a bit stir them in and mix thoroughly.  Place in the refridgerator for at least one hour.  This will help them to firm up so they don't fall apart.
When you are ready to cook 'em up, heat a small amount of oil in a non stick skillet over medium high heat. Form the mixture into patties and place in the hot oil.  Cook 3-4 minutes each side or until lightly browned.  Gently flip and cook for 3-4 minutes on the other side.  Place on a plate lined with a paper towel to absorb any excess oil. 
I served these up on toasted sourdough bread with some lettuce, red onion and a little dijon mustard mixed with some vegenaise. 

Crack open a cold beer, make yourself a burger and get down with it...